Thursday, June 5, 2014

Inane Facebook Polls

There is a trend in emails and on Facebook.  People are sending and posting a variety of polls.  They are not just polls, they are kind of fun polls that are offer insights into our personalities.  Here are some of these polls or surveys that many have no doubt seen many of these

  • Find your spirit animal?
  • What famous movie star are you?
  • Which Looney Tunes character are you?
  • What country should you be living in?
  • And many more...

I have taken many of these quizzes, polls, surveys, or whatever you call them.  Websites that seem to feature most of them seem to have the word 'buzz' in them.  There is BuzzFeed and PlayBuzz.  There probably is or should be others BuzzHead, BrainBuzz,  BuzzAzz, BizBuzz, Bluzzter…

I understand that they are designed to be fun and entertaining.  I really understand that.  But... I find them horribly irritated and ridiculously lame.

  • Which Disney royalty are you most like?  Aladdin.
  • Aladdin?  This did not resonate with me but a few friend thought it apropos.

I find the questions too restrictive.  This probably comes from years of designing questionnaires for serious business surveys.  Often, none of the alternatives appeal or apply to me.  I get it, they are trying to steer you to classify everyone into one of a small number of pigeonholes.  If there are 8 questions with 5 choices for each question, then there are 40 unique answers.    Several answers probably map to an answer.  For example, if the survey is to answer "Which of the Seven Dwarfs are you?", there are only seven possible outcomes.  I had forgotten that 'Lumpy' was one of the dwarfs.

  • Which PlayBuzz quiz should you play?
  • The answer was "Which Shakespeare character am I?"

I know it these are diversions that are supposed to be fun and cute.  There is no reason I should be so aggravated by them.  As I am apparently aggravated by them, I should probably just avoid.  For some equally aggravating reason, I do the opposite… I click on the link and answer the questions, muttering to myself the entire time.

  • Which Shakespeare character am I?  Othello.
  • Othello?  Really?  It did not strike a chord with me.

Hopefully, by writing this bit of a rant, I will simply stop being suckered into these inane polls whenever I see them on Facebook.  Maybe, I should just curtail my time on Facebook too.  Better yet, I might even reassess all my frivolities!  That may just be more change than I could possibly manage.

I’ve got it.  I will make up my own polls and surveys.  I will provide enough questions and options in each question to make the results really meaningful. 

  • Which USSR Premier are you?
  • Which rodent defines you?
  • Which logical positivist are your channelling?
  • Which infectious disease most resembles your personality?
  • What flavor Hostess Fruit Pie are you?
  • Which maqam speaks to your soul?
  • Which Andrews sister are you?
  • Which county in Iowa should you live in?
  • Which character in the sitcom What’s Happening!! are you
  • Which US Vice-President defines your work ethic?
This going to be fun!

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